Secrets

     Little Guy is constantly reminded never to keep secrets from us.   When asked why, I cited two reasons.  First is that you keep a secret because you want to surprise someone with a good deed but this secret will be revealed in a short while.  Second is that you are ashamed of what you have done so you want to keep it a secret.

     With Little Guy, therefore, the first things he blurts out are the very things you ask him to keep as a secret.  Things like “Don’t tell Lala that we indulged in ice cream, ok?” or “Don’t tell them I did not bathe you!”

     Well, maybe when he is older, I can tell him that he needs to keep other people’s secrets because that is those other people’s own business.  In the meantime, I am happy that he can be carefree without the burden of keeping any secret from us; much unlike some friends and acquaintances of mine.

       Take Sam for example, a man well into his late thirties or even early forties.  Has a good job and peaceful life.  Sam has a daughter from a past relationship in his youth.  He dotes on this daughter and whatever she asks, he gives.  The girl is in her pre-teen and since childhood, she has only one repeated wish of Sam – he should never get married.  It happens, though, that Sam has met, fallen in love and asked the girl of his dreams to marry.  The wedding is scheduled for a few days from now.  To date, Sam has been on needles and pins thinking of how and when he could break the news to his little girl.  His fiancée has always been supportive of him but in this instance, she asks if it will impact the girl less if he waits till she is a full grown lady.  Patiently, the fiancée waits for Sam to take action and maybe, cringing a little in anticipation for nuclear-like fall-out when truth is told.

     Maggie is another friend whose unsolved secret is even worse.  Attractive and smart, Maggie married young to her regret.  The man was irresponsible and such an unreliable provider they had to seek help and shelter with her parents.  Soon, Maggie asked for relief from the marriage and filed for annulment.  Because she had a little girl to support, Maggie sought and found a good job.  Thinking it would be less complicated, she passed herself off as Single in her application.  Through the years, she had been known as single and available in her working life.  Her darling daughter was often introduced as a niece.  Because of the love and protection of Maggie’s parents, the daughter, Raine, never felt anything was amiss with being introduced as a niece.  As luck would have it, Maggie met a decent man; an excellent “catch” so to say.  As soon as her annulment was approved, the couple married; the man completely ignorant of the previous marriage, annulment and Raine, the daughter.  All the time, he knew her as Raine, the niece under the care of his parents-in-law.   Raine is now in her late teens and still lives with her grandparents.  Often, during family reunions, she has to content herself with watching her mom, step-dad and new little sibling form the nucleus of a loving family.  When will she be allowed to join her real family – only time will tell. 

     Two parents, two daughters – all embroiled in a web of secrets and deception. 

     I can only watch them with devastating sadness.